Around this time of year, when everyone is getting ready for the holidays, I always feel a little overwhelmed. A feeling that I’m not doing enough. A feeling that I should be buying all the things and doing all the things.
A feeling that I have to do it all in order to be a good mom.
I have to decorate with the prettiest lights and serve the candy cane pancakes for breakfast. I have to wear the most trendy sweaters. I have to think of the most unique gifts for my kids.
And maybe this is a flaw of my own, but I know I’m not the only mom out there who worries about being perfect. Perfection is innate in us – we want to be the best mom, the best wife, the best employee. Whatever it is, we strive to be better than our best.
Better than our best is not sustainable, though.
The exhaustion that comes with just being a mom day in and day out, and then we add on this perfection? This need to be and do the best. It’s overwhelming. It’s impossible to keep up with.
And every year, I try to let go just a little bit more – I don’t go to every holiday party that is offered. I don’t buy all the decorations – the Dollar Store wrapping paper will do just fine.
How do I let go of this perfectionism and live in the moment?
Let’s translate this into our lives in general. We don’t have to have all the most expensive baby equipment. We don’t have to go to every family meal that is planned. We are allowed to do our best, but not be perfect.
I like to remind myself that I don’t have to do it all with these simple affirmations. Give them a try.
Affirmations for the holidays
I am happy with what I have.
I will allow myself to rest today.
My children love me, no matter what.
I don’t have to do it all.
I enjoy my life just as it is.
Repeat these affirmations to yourself. Also, try to take just ONE thing off of your plate this year. Delegate a holiday task to a family member or take it out of the picture all together. Trust me, you won’t miss it.
Do what’s right for you.
Don’t scroll through social media comparing your holiday to someone else’s. We all have our own traditions and things that we enjoy doing. Put the phone down and be present in your life right now.
I read yesterday about this idea that, even when our life isn’t what we expected it to be for whatever reason, we can still find joy in what it is now. If we didn’t have the birth we wanted, or if our child has a health concern, or if we are diagnosed with depression or anxiety – we still have to look for ways to be present. Be mindful. Bring just a glimmer of happiness to your day.
Take this into your day today. Know that you are an amazing mother just the way you are, not the way you think you should be. It’s okay to strive for your best, but take a look at reality and don’t let perfectionism rule your life. You are doing a good job, mama.